


It's Greener When You're Here

by Kitty_carrot



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crossdressing, Falling In Love, Flashbacks, Fluff, Gender Confusion, Happy, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Sexual Abuse, Romance, Sad, Smut, Underage - Freeform, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-28
Updated: 2014-02-10
Packaged: 2018-01-10 08:58:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1157705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitty_carrot/pseuds/Kitty_carrot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niall Horan owns a small irish pub at the end of the street and he really likes to read. One day, some underage kid with a fake leather jacket comes into the pub and knows the author of Niall's book. Niall doesn't know what this poor looking lad wants, but he thinks it's okay if he stays for a while.<br/>This is their story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Thomas Barret?"

Niall's head perks up at the voice mysteriously close to him. It was a skinny boy standing a foot away. Why is he over by the pool table? It's midday, and pool's not much fun as a single player game.

"Yeah, you know him?" Niall lifts his book a bit higher and jerks his head toward it. The boy nods his head.

"I do know of him. Heard he's good."

The boy looked suspiciously young to be in a pub. And he was scruffy, bruised, kicked up, his clothes were very worn-out, like he'd been wearing them for years. The boy basically screamed poor.

"So, you've never read any of his work?" Niall provides a tilt to his head with his question. The boy bites his lip and shrugs his shoulders slightly.

"Haven't ever got the chance." The lad offers a smile and leans back against the varnished wood of the pool table. Niall's eyebrows furrow closer together and he closes his book, being sure to mark the page right before.

"How old are you, kid?" Niall's body lurched forward and his elbows rested on his denim covered knees. The boy opened his mouth and shut it again, he rubbed his nose and blinked slowly at Niall.

"I'm seventeen, but nearly legal. I'm not here to buy a drink, I promise." He assures Niall. Niall just snorts a short laugh.

"Then why are you here, mate. This is a pub you know."

"I've always just wanted to take a peek inside." He says with another sheepish shrug.

"Fair enough." Niall falls back into his chair comfortably again and picks up his novel. He reads the first line before the boy begins to speak again.

"So you own this place?"

Niall sighs and clamps his book together again, then he stands up and places it in the old chair.

"Look kid, I'm trying to read. Just- go the bar. You can tell them the drink's on me- the boss, but you have to promise me you'll stay over there and quit bugging me." The boy nods quickly, muttering a thank you, and stands straight. Niall waves him on to the counter and the boy strides off. Niall defiantly doesn't notice the length of the kid's body as he walks away, before he returns to his novel.

 

The boy sits there all afternoon and Niall can't help but wonder if the lads ever going to leave. When he walks over the bar, the kid's still nursing the same bottle as a few hours back. He's got the nearly empty beer set aside while he's doodling mindlessly on a notepad. Niall thinks the bartender leant him that.

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" the boy jumps. He turns around and frowns a bit.

"Are you hinting for me to leave? I don't know if you are because I'm not good at telling when people are hinting. Sorry, um, I'll leave?" Niall grabs the boy's shoulder forcing him to stay seated.

"No, you don't have to leave, I'm asking legitimately. Like, do you have something to do?" Niall tried his best to sound none-sarcastic, because he actually wasn't being sarcastic for once and it didn't come naturally to him.

"Suppose not," he pulls his shoulders up and drops them. "Probably be walking the streets alone if I weren't here." The kid pulls the glass bottle to his lips and takes the smallest, selfless sip Niall has ever seen. He probably didn't even indent the level of liquid.

"Thank you." he raises the glass. Niall's sighs and snaps his fingers for the bartender's attention.

"Get him another." The boy looked back up to Niall in surprise.

"You don't have too." Niall is the one to shrug this time.

"Thank you, uh..." his eyes flicker for Niall to fill the blank.

"Niall."

"Well, thank you Niall."

 

The original beer is completely empty once the boy is handed his second drink. Niall notes that the second is washed down much quicker then first, and even thought the drink is gone around 7:45, the boy sits on the same stool into until closing.

"Kid, it's time to go home." Niall says after stacking the chairs over the tables. The boy stands up and scoffs, "yeah... home." Niall wonders about that. The kid begins to walk to the door.

"Wait, before you go." Niall pulls from his back pocket the book he had been reading, and held it out in front as an offering. "Here."

"No. I couldn't." the kid shakes his head as he stares at the novel.

"I'm done reading it. I have no use for it now anyways." Niall shrugs and urges it closer. "Please, take it." Niall looked sincere.

"My name is Harry Styles. If you wanted to know..." he says quietly as he grabs the book from the Irishman. "Thank you, Niall."

"Okay."

 

Harry is back a day later and is walking directly to Niall as he enters. He's wearing a sheepish grin and has the book clutched to his chest protectively. Harry's hair looks curly and clean...-er than usual. His jeans look the same as before and he seems to be sporting the same leather-like, brown jacket.

"The book was outstanding. Thank you so much. I really enjoyed it." Harry places the printed work down beside Niall's knuckles, on the counter top.

"It's was good. But I wouldn't say it's one of his bests." Niall grabs it off the marble top and stores it in a shelf behind the bar.

"Well, I guess I haven't read enough great books to compare to anything." Harry shrugs and blushes a bit. Feeling embarrassed for liking something so much when it wasn't the best.

"Oh, um, here." Harry's hand dives into his coat pocket and he pulls out a couple bills.

"What's this for." Niall quirked an eyebrow up.

"Just, um- the drinks the other day." he proposes the bills but Niall refuses.

"Don't need your money, kid. Besides, I said it was on me, didn't I?" Niall smirked and step out from around the counter. Harry's swallows and shoves the money back into its cheap jacket.

"I gotta head out. Thanks again for lending the book!" Harry shouts behind him. Niall hears the door chime clang and the rough-edged boy is gone.

 

Niall locks the remaining door and turns to head upstairs to his flat. He reaches the first step but stops promptly in his track.

What did Harry find so 'outstanding' about Thomas's story. It was so much sappier then any of his others. Romance books really weren't Niall's thing, he only read it because he didn't want to miss a book in the collection, but still, It wasn't even that good.

Niall turns around and jogs back to the bar. He leans over the clean counter and reaches to snatch the book. He turns the book over to the back and sighs. Maybe he should read it again, to see what Harry saw in the story. He bends the book slightly and lets the pages slip past his thumb quickly. Niall catches an odd page with his finger and spreads the two halves apart. There are two bills tucked in neatly with a pencilled note on it.

I had a feeling you wouldn't take my money. -h xx

"There's a loophole in everything; you just have to find it or make your own."-Thomas Barret 

 

Niall smiles foolishly and pulls the cash from between the pages. He rushes up stairs and heads into his flat for the night.


	2. Chapter 2

Harry is there at opening and he helps take down the chairs and readies the bar.

"If you need any help around the place I can work for you." Harry interjects quietly as they settle down at a bar stool.

"When're you turning eighteen?" Niall nudges Harry's arm with his finger. Harry looks up to think and rubs the underneath of his nose. 

"Few weeks." Harry frowns. Niall tilts his head and nods slowly.

"I'll think about it, kid."

"Thanks."

 

Days later, Harry promises Niall that he'd come in every morning to help open the pub, free of charge. Obviously Niall takes the offer, but he gives Harry food as his payment despite the 'free of charge'. Harry doesn't eat very much, Niall discovers. He'd spend most of his day there and only has a few chips from Niall's lunch or even a few bites of fish. Niall presumes that's the reason behind Harry's thin body. 

"You're gonna disappear if you don't eat something, lad." Niall sets a full meal in front of Harry. Harry frowns and picks up the greased potato and bites off a small piece. Niall watches Harry's miserable expression and sighs, sitting down along side the kid. "What's the deal?" 

"I guess I don't fancy having food in my mouth." Harry shrugs his usual shrug and carries on nibbling at the single chip. He wears a small pout and Niall leaves it at that.

 

"I finished another book, you want to try it out?" Niall bids the book and Harry takes it excitedly. He skims the back summary and his bright dimpled smile never leaves him for a moment.

"I'd love to, thank you."

"But, Harry," Niall starts, "when you return it I'd like you to write me your favourite quote. Like last time." He continues. "I liked that." Niall couldn't help but smile and Harry's cheeks lit up while he nodded frantically. 

"Of course." 

 

Niall hasn't seen Harry for four day's and he's beginning to worry. He'd normally see the lad every day, and if not, every other instead. He was just about to lock the entrance when Harry limped into view. His face clattered with scraps and bruises, his clothes and hair a bit more tattered the normal, lip chapped in dry blood, and his fringe clung to his clammy forehead, despite the cold weather out.

Niall rips open the door, making the chimes go wild, and he guides Harry inside the small pub gently. He was trembling.

"You okay Harry?" Niall's voice is quiet and it soothes Harry in a way.

"I don't- I can't return your book. It's gone." Harry forces the words out through a rough, wrecked throat and bows his head in shame. "I lost your book. I'm sorry." Harry begins to cry and Niall drags him upstairs to his flat, with out a word. They make it onto Niall's couch and the Irishman begins to speak.

"What happened to you?" Niall dabs Harry's re-spit lip with a flannel. He cleans Harry's face and the boy winces with every short contact.

"I lost your book." Harry says pathetically.

"That wasn't the question."

"I got, um, jumped. I guess..." Harry shifts his bum and winces coiling into himself, holding his ribs.

"You guess?" Niall snaps. Harry flinches and pulls into himself more. "Sorry, sorry."

The blond boy slides Harry's coat zipper down and guides it over his shoulders as considerably as he can. The jacket disappears somewhere and Harry's eyes slip shut and there is a tug to his eyebrows.

"Where's you're washroom? I think I'm bleeding again..." Harry whispers. Niall gives the younger lad a sceptical look but points down the hall to Harry's desired destination.

"On the left." He mutters. Harry stands slowly with a hand pressed to his lower back. The boy limps across the room and drags his feet through the door, shuts and locks it after him.

He's in there for a good half hour and it worries Niall again. 

"Harry, you holding up?" Niall knocks on the door and he hears a hiccup of breath from Harry. The door opens abruptly and it sends Niall a step back. Harry's shirt is stained through with blood over the bottom of his left ribcage and Niall frowns. Harry sports a sad smile and stares at Niall for a moment, in silence, then his lips parted slowly.

"If the bad never occurred, then the good wouldn't portray itself." 

Niall stands for a brief second to acknowledge what Harry really meant.

"Your favourite quote." Niall realizes and Harry is content, his green eyes seem somehow greener then before. "You can stay here for tonight." Niall proposes. Normally Harry would refuse the offer, finding an excuse not to, but he doesn't this time, he just continues to smile with watery eyes and thanks Niall for the millionth time since they've met.

 

In the morning, Niall finds himself eating breakfast with Harry. The boy is smiling helplessly, and shovelling food past his thin, red lips. Harry was only smiling because Niall was too. Neither knew what got them to this point but it seems too right, so they continue for the rest of their breakfast.

"Niall, I think you should tell me one thing about yourself." Harry say through a giggle, at some point of their meal. Niall scratches his chin and leans into his chair. 

"What do you want to know? Something big, something small?" Niall asks.

"Anything." Niall thinks Harry's cheeks must be hurting by now from his smile.

"I'm left handed." And that's good enough for Harry because the fact that he knows one more thing about Niall makes him feel that much more like a friend.

"Thanks."

 

Harry takes it easy for the day because Niall makes sure he does. He gives the boy a book to occupy him and seems to work from opening to closing time. Harry prepares himself and is about to exit when Niall stops him with a call of his name.

"Where are you staying?"

"My parents." He answered automatically.

"Really?" 

"Yes." 

Niall stares for six seconds and Harry begins to gets fidgety and nervous. Niall takes a step closer to Harry and the boy's eyes are threatened with tears.

"Harry..." 

"Don't worry about me, Niall." Harry smiles dolefully and Niall thinks that his own heart is hurting because of it. 

"I will worry about you! You can't come into my pub everyday and spend your morning to evenings here and expect me not to worry!" Niall snaps. A tear drips from Harry wide eyes and Niall sighs, frustrated with him self for not being able to control his obnoxious volume.

"I live... by the park near Dalloway St." Harry admits slowly. His eyes have left Niall's and he seems to shrink in fear.

"Harry... there aren't any houses near-" Niall halts himself and concern fills his body. All Niall can do is pray that what he was thinking wasn't Harry's case.

"I know." Harry's voice cracks and Niall thinks he's about to fall apart. The blond boy pulls Harry into an embrace as if to literally hold him together.

"You're... homeless." Niall couldn't help but hold him tighter. Harry just melts to Niall's body and they remain like that for the perfect amount of time. Niall thinks something's happening to his feelings towards Harry and he really hates to ignore it but he does anyway, and brings Harry up stairs to his flat.

Niall makes Harry shower and he thinks the boy is in there for hours, but maybe he's not.

 

Harry is tucked into Niall's bed and a kiss is planted along his damp clean curls. Niall's moist blue eyes show sympathy for the young boy as he sits and brushes Harry's hair off his forehead. 

"Tell me something about yourself." Harry whispers. Niall smiles and sighs, bringing himself down beside Harry and placing his hand on the boy's clothed chest. He pressed his fingers in where they lay and Harry breaths smoothly.

"My mum and dad left me the pub so they could move to America." Niall says, exhaustion seeping through his voice.

"Did you want that?" Niall thinks Harry sounds too innocent for his own good.

"I wasn't my ideal future, but I can't complain. It isn't that bad, I guess." 

Harry's eyes are closed now but he is nodding. 

"What about you, Harry? What do you have planned?" Niall sees Harry shrug plainly.

"Nothing. I don't have the proper education, so I can't do anything worthwhile." He admits. Harry opens his eyes and he turns his body up on its side to face Niall.

"Do you like me?" 

Niall hesitates before his answer and he stares at Harry in the eyes for a moment then speaks up.

"How do you mean?"

"Do you... like me?" Harry repeats slightly confused about why Niall didn't understand his question. The blond man laughs quietly and presses his nose to Harry's soft, pale cheek.

"I think so."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!! i apologize for any spelling or grammar errors. feedback would be lovely xx :D


	3. Chapter 3

Niall is waking up suddenly and Harry is whimpering while his body squirms in his sleep. The two must have fallen asleep at some point before Niall could make his way to the couch for the night.

The moon is still high and the room is only lit up the slightest bit. Niall grabs Harry's body and shakes him awake. His eyes rip open and he's panting then scrambling away from Niall, his limbs are kicking around and the older lad knows Harry is still partly asleep.

"Harry. Stop. It's just a dream." He tries to say calmly. He continues to flail around so Niall resorts to grabbing Harry's biceps and snapping his voice. "Harry!" the boy's body stills and he blinks up at Niall three times. Harry's wide eyes slowly shut, and he falls back asleep almost instantly.

 

Niall wakes up again, only this time it's morning and Harry is still sound asleep in his arms. He smiles at the thin boy and pulls him closer. Harry sighs in his sleep and Niall can't help but wonder if Harry is enjoying his company as much as he was enjoying Harry's.

Niall's eyes find Harry's soft face and he brings his hand up slowly to cup the beautiful boy's cheek, leaning forward, just the slightest bit. Harry's lips are slightly parted and his light breath caresses Niall's paler skin.

He can sensate the air gliding along his chin and it sends an unfamiliar wave of pleasure down his spine. He lets his eyes fall shut and he leans closer again. This time he feels something press against him and Niall knows it is Harry's perfect pink lips pushed to his. The hands on Harry's cheek travels into his curly brown hair and it nests at the back of his head. Niall stomach feels bombarded with fluttery butterflies and he wants to stay exactly like this forever, but he knows, since Harry is stirring in his sleep, that it's wrong what he's doing and it's time to pull away. So Niall does exactly that and pulls himself out of his bed and his room before Harry can wake.

 

"Niall!" Harry's voice is urgent and terrified and Niall fumbles the mixing spoon. "Niall! Help!" Niall is out of the kitchen and is down the hall to his room. He swings open the door and Harry's curled up at the head of the bed pointing at something across the room.

Niall's eyes follow Harry's finger and he sees a decent sized spider racing up the wall.

"Get it!" Harry shrieks. "Kill it!"

Niall laughs and he sighs in relief, it could have been worse. He walks over to the harmless creature and holds a hand out for it to crawl on. It scurries onto his finger and Niall notes that this had to be the largest spider he's ever held. He glances up at Harry and the boy wore a horrified expression. Niall walks over to Harry with the bug in his hand and Harry gives a warning look.

"What, you scared of him? But he's so cute." He holds his hand up to Harry's face and the boy squeals loudly.

"Stop!" Harry threw the blanket over his entire body and curled into a ball. Niall is in hysterics as he walks to the window to free the spider on to the exterior ledge and Harry is muttering that it wasn't funny.

"I'm just teasing, Harry." Niall sat down on the bed tugging at the blankets. Harry continues to hold it firmly cocooned over him, so Niall walks his fingers along Harry's back. "C'mon out, he's gone. I promise." He pulls again at the blue comforter but Harry clutches it in his fists even harder. "Harry... please, come out. I'm sorry, I won't ever scare you like that again. I'll make sure to protect you, okay? I'll save you from all the creepy bugs." Niall promises and Harry finally releases his hold. He uncovers his face and there is a dark blush burning his skin.

"I'm sorry, I over reacted." Harry sits up and crawls over and hugs Niall from the side. "You still like me right?" he whispers, and if Niall hadn't been so aware of Harry he wouldn't have heard.

"Of course." Niall replies.

"Do you like being around me?" Harry asks. His hands imbedded in Niall's night shirt.

"Harry, I love being around you, and that is really something if you ask me, because I don't like being around people to begin with." Niall's arms snake around Harry's slender body and he can feel him shiver from his actions.

"I'd like to work for you Niall." Harry says after a while.

"Okay."

 

"Niall, how much do you take from my pay check?" Harry asks one night during dinner. Niall give a confused look and shakes his head thoroughly.

"I don't." Harry's eyebrows furrow.

"I need to pay rent for staying here." he exclaims. "I can't live in your home with out paying you something." Niall just smiles with soft eyes.

"I don't need your money. I'm well off with out it. I want you to keep everything you worked for." Niall grabs Harry's hand and squeezes, showing that he was telling the truth.

Harry pulls his hand away and looks into his lap nervously

"Do you want something else then, like, sex... or whatever?" Niall's eyes open bigger and he swallows worriedly.

"Harry, you should never offer your body like that. It's- it's not right." Niall shakes his head to him self and he sees Harry shrug.

"It doesn't matter." Niall feels almost offended in a way.

"Doesn't matter- Harry? Your body should mean everything to you. Sex should be for love, not for... paying rent." He informs, his hands gesturing in the air. Harry's blaring eyes look up into Niall's and he pushes away from the table furiously. Niall thinks this is the first time he's seen Harry angry.

"Thanks for dinner." He snaps. Harry storms off into Niall's bedroom and slams the door behind him.

The blond boy sighs and rubs two frustrated hands over his face. He stands himself from his seat and makes his way over to his room leaving his half finished meal behind. He opens the door and Harry is curled up under the covers with the back of his head facing Niall.

He walks over to the bed and slides in behind Harry, spooning him carefully.

"Sorry. I'm stupid." Harry's crying. It's evident from the waver his voice.

"You're not. Why did you get angry, though? Please tell me." Niall wraps his arm around Harry's waist and plays with the hem of the boy's shirt.

"Because you were wrong." Harry whispers. "Because she didn't love me and I didn't love her." He states plainly.

"I don't understand." Niall's face is buried into Harry's hair as he speaks.

"That's why I'm homeless." Harry says. It only confuses Niall further.

"Harry, babe. Please explain..."

Niall felt Harry's hand glide down his arm and intertwine with his fingers from overtop.

"Will you still like me after I tell you?" I whispers.

Niall nods, "and maybe even more." Harry wiggles back, getting even closer.

"I was 7 years old when mum and dad got a divorce and 12 when mum got remarried. The man she married had a 16 year old daughter. She was always the one to babysit me when our parents would go out for dinner or a date, you know... It started with her giving me baths, and then it escalated to changing my clothes for me," Harry paused for a moment and then pulled their held hand close to his chest. "then she started touching me and- oh god- and she undressed me one day and held me down and we had sex. That's when it all started. I hated it, every second, but I got hard and came every time. It went on for years, even when I was strong enough to fight her off, she would wait until I fell asleep to tie me down so I was helpless. I didn't understand..." A tremble rushed through Niall's body and Harry's slowly continued with a shuttering voice. "One night when I was 16, she came to me and admitted she loved me and she apologized for everything. she promised me that if she could have me one last time, she would never have sex with me again. so I fell for it and I did it, and right as I came... she screamed, our parents ran in and she was crying and shouting that I raped her and it all happened so fast I didn't know what to do... she lied, she didn't love me." Harry's tone was small.

"She ended up not pressing any charges but my mum and step dad kicked me out a month later and I've been living on the street ever since." He ends in a whisper and sniffing him nose.

"I'm so sorry Harry. I don't know what to say. Now, I know why you got angry and I completely understand." Niall kissed the back of Harry's goose bumped neck.

"No, it's my fault, I probably got carried away and hurt her, so she got scared. I hurt her, didn't I?" Harry asked turning his body around to face Niall. Tears stain Harry's soft features.

He shakes his head at the boy. "fuck, Harry no! I'm sure you didn't, and even if you did, she deserved it. You were 12 years old the first time. For god sake she raped you, not the other way around." Harry's eyes close and he smiles sadly.

"I guess that's why I like boys then." He laughed pathetically prying his eyelids apart again.

"No, you like boys because you like boys." Niall corrects. Harry nuzzles into Niall's neck and rubs him nose along the skin there. "and Harry?" Harry hums and Niall goes on. "you can't help the fact that your dick is prone to pleasure." Niall and Harry stifle a laugh.

"Can I ask you something?"

"You just did." Niall chuckles.

"I love you." Niall stops breathing.

"That's not a question."

"I love you?" Harry tries. Niall shakes his head and sighs a protest.

"I don't think I like that as a question as much." Harry snuggles into Niall, in an impossibly close way. Niall laughs and pulls his face back and elevates Harry's to his. Niall leans in, in an all too familiar way -like the way he did that one morning as Harry slept. Their lips connect and Harry gasps into Niall's mouth innocently. Niall's eyes slip shut immediately and mends into the kiss harder, hotter. His hands guide into Harry's hair, and Niall decides nothing could be better then this.

They both draw away in unison and they blink in silence for a few seconds.

Harry begins to giggle and Niall's heart felt so full of affection.

"I really love you." Harry blurts out foolishly. Niall pretends not to notice the small bulge in Harry's pants. But really, he notices Harry's semi and adrenaline kicks in, and Niall ignores it as best as he can.

"I don't know if I love you back, but I certainly like you a lot, and there is defiantly a chance there may be more." Harry's eyes burn green, again, they just seem greener then when they're apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading this! i only have 14 kudos but i am so happy! feedback is always lovely! thanks xxx


	4. Chapter 4

Niall falls in love with Harry they day he comes running into the pub crying with something cradled in his arms. Niall runs over to him and worry is pulsing through is heart. 

Harry is holding an injured kitten in his arm's and is crying hysterically, begging Niall to call an ambulance... He obviously isn't thinking straight.

"I s-saw the m-man hit him, Niall. His poor leg, it's broken I- I know it!" Harry exclaims, ignoring the tears staining his face.

 

After 25 minutes, Harry is calmer and they are at the veterinary clinic.

"Will he be okay?" Harry whimpers to a nurse. She nods, smiles, and reassures Harry it's only a broken leg and that it wasn't fatal. Niall has to basically drag Harry from the building because he doesn't want to leave without the kitten. Niall explains that the cat is someone else's and that they must be worried sick.

Harry finally understands the circumstances and gets into Niall's car. The older boy's heart broke, but felt the most alive when Harry sobbed the whole ride home. 

 

That night after closing, up in Niall's flat, Harry is reading a book he had bought- with his own money, a few days back- and he's glancing up at Niall every few lines, with a cheeky grin plastered on his face. The blond man wonders what Harry's on about, so he walks over and Harry hides his book in his lap.

"What are you doing?" Niall laughs. Harry grins sheepishly and nibbling on his bottom lip.

"Nothing." He was giggling ridiculously.

Niall snatched the book from his hand and quickly ran away with it into the bathroom, locking it. Seconds after Niall seals himself in the room, Harry is at the door begging Niall not to read it. 

Niall looks down at the book and disobeys Harry by reading the first paragraph on the page Harry had been reading out loud.

"Adam slid his hands up Jake's bare thighs and spreads them apart gently. The boy underneath him gasped at the feeling of his boyfriend this close to him for the first time. The older boy teases Jake by running his teeth along the sensitive skin on the insides of his legs and by pressing wet kisses up towards his erection." Niall smirks and unlocks the door. "Harry!" he gasps dramatically. "You dirty, dirty boy." 

Harry is sporting a heavy blush that reaches his unmarked neck, and Niall hands the book back to him chuckling.

"Just because I love you, doesn't mean you can tease me about things like that." Harry protests, pouting as he speaks and it only makes Niall laugh harder, which only leads to more embarrassment for Harry. "Shut up, I have to learn some how!" Harry is crossing his arms and Niall stops laughing.

"Learn?" Niall is holding a straight face now and Harry steps back a bit with a small, innocent shrug.

"Yeah... you know... two guys doing, um, that." 

And that's it, that's when Niall knows that he loves Harry. That's when he realizes how much he loves how caring, beautiful, lovable, sweet, fucking innocent and perfect Harry is.

"I'll teach you." Niall offers quietly. Harry's head perks up, looking at Niall with wide unbelieving eyes and he is contemplating the surprising words.

"I love you, Harry." Niall thinks that Harry's about to faint before he replies. 

"I love you, Niall."

 

Harry thinks it's funny that Niall has no friends. He thinks that it's funny that all of Niall's bartenders like him more then they do Niall. Harry thinks it is hilarious how jealous Niall gets when the bartenders are hands-on with him behind the bar.

"Dean, back to work!" Niall snaps. He's over at the pool table 'reading his book'- but really watching Harry work behind the counter.

Niall can hear Harry's stupidly cute giggling from across the pub and it makes him want to go over there and kiss him half to death. But obviously he doesn't and continues 'reading his book'.

 

"Can I have all my pay checks now?" it shocks Niall when he hears this because Harry's never asked for more the 20pounds at once.

"why do you need it all?" Niall replies. He doesn't mean to be nosey, he's only curious.

"I'm buying my own flat." He states proudly. Niall's heart drops and he begins to panic. Why did Harry want to move out? Why would he not want to stay with Niall? They loved each other, why not live together?

"Why would you want to do that?" Niall asks, the heart break in his chest seeping into his voice.

"I don't want to live here." It's almost like Niall didn't recognize this 'Harry' speaking to him.

"Well, why not?" his voice cracks but brushes it off.

"I want to start a real life, one I'm in control of. One where I am not living off the man I work for. I can't rely on people anymore, Niall. I just can't. You can understand that, right?" his eyes beg for agreement.

Niall stares at Harry in silence for only a second longer before nodding and pulling a pathetic smile to his lips.

"Of course Harry, I understand." Niall is about to burst into tears so he turns around and walks to the kitchen to retrieve Harry's small safe of money. He opens the highest cabinet and pulls the box of bills down to his chest, then reaching up again, pulling the key from the same location. Niall takes a deep breath and he shakes his mind clear of any sad thoughts. He leaves the room and brings the metal box to Harry. 

"Here you go. It's all in here." Niall smiles but Harry can tell it's fake and he frowns.

"I don't want you to be unhappy about this." Harry sets the box on the coffee table and strides directly over to Niall. He opens his arms and wraps them tightly around the blond lad. Harry's face sits an inch from Niall's and that almost enough for the latter, almost. 

Niall shoves his head forward and Harry's gasps as innocently as he did during their first kiss. The boy's hands move from Niall's torso and they implant into Niall's dyed blond hair. Niall's tongues swipes for entry but Harry's lips stay pinned together solidly.

"Part your lips, babe." Niall whispers with his eyes loosely closed. Niall doesn't even know if Harry has obeyed his orders, but he leans in again anyways hoping he has. Their lips meet and Harry mouth is open but quivering. Niall pulls his hands to Harry's cheeks and caresses them gently with cupped palms. He makes sure the kiss stays slow for a moment for Harry's sake, and then presses his wet tongue inside when he thinks Harry's okay. Their pink lips are open and locked together as Niall slides his tongue along Harry's, drawing a long moan from him. Niall's hands make there way down Harry's chest, they pass his hips and grip the back of his thighs. Harry jumps into Niall arms almost by instinct and he wraps tight legs around Niall's small waist. Harry tugs roughly at the back of Niall's head, earning a dark moan from his partner. Niall turns around and shoves Harry's back into the wall getting a small aid on Harry's light weight. Harry's mouth gets lazy and his jaw is beginning to ache so Niall pulls away and moves along to his unmarked neck.

"Niall," he begins, though his laboured pants. "I have an appointment with the landlord now." Despite what he tells Niall, Harry continues to press the older boy into his neck. Niall sucks a deep love bite into Harry's neck and the boy whimpers at the unfamiliar feeling. "Niall, you should stop." he whispers.

"I should, but I'm not going to." Niall grips Harry's thighs, pulling him off the wall and walking over to the couch. He throws Harry on the furniture and crawls over him pinning him to the cushions. "Harry, this is your home. Please don't move away from it." Harry eyes light up and Niall thinks he's blind to everything but green. But soon the orbs fade into fright and the younger's hands struggle under Niall's, he wasn't enjoying the restraints, at all. 

"Don't hold me down." he orders. Niall pulls gripped hands away from the serious boy, and the second he does, Harry's own hands are pressing Niall's chest away from him. "You know what happened, why would you-..." His voice was nothing more then a quiet breath as he trails off and his eyes were to the ceiling, it made Niall think Harry didn't want him.

"Harry?" 

"I have to go. I don't want to be late." Niall sits up on his knees to allow Harry an exit. The boy is off the couch and out the door before Niall can process what just happened.

Something clicks in his mind and tears surface and pulls his hands to his face, rubbing in frustration.

"Fuck!"

Niall knows he's stupid, Niall knows he never thinks. Niall knows that Harry was held down a raped as a child but Niall's stupid and never thinks and he held Harry down and scared him away. 

 

Harry doesn't come to work the next day like he was supposed to. It makes him nervous because Harry never misses a day of work unless something bad happens, but Niall leaves it alone 'because Harry just bought a flat and he needs to get settled... right?

 

Harry still doesn't come to work three days later and he doesn't come to get his things from Niall's place either. It worries Niall to the verge of tears and it frightens him enough for him to leave the pub half through the day and head into his flat to research the whereabouts of Harry and his apartment building. He loads a search engine on his laptop and searches for the cheapest flats in the area. He calls three buildings asking for Harry's name before finding the right one. He drives over immediately and when he gets there, he sprints up the stairs praying that Harry is home. The place is scummy but it's what Harry can afford.

Niall's heart begins to punch his chest at the thought of what could've happened to Harry. Anything could have happened to him. He could have been jumped again, or mugged, or raped... or killed. The thought sent unpleasant shivers down his spine and it made his heart throb uncomfortably. 

He attacks the door with his restless fists and- thank god- Harry answers, with wide eyes.

"Niall? How did you-..."

The Irishman pulls him into his arms, nuzzling his face deep in his neck.

"I was so scared, you asshole!" he shouts through is tears. "I haven't heard from you in days! I thought something happened! Do you know how worried I was?!" Harry's eyes remained wide and Niall remained sobbing in the taller boy's arms.

Harry pulled Niall into his flat and shut the door behind the two.

"I'm okay, Niall. I didn't mean to worry you." Harry's voice is small and gentle and that alone calms Niall's wild nerves. The two inched away and Harry observed Niall's heated cheeks and clammy forehead. Sweat clung to Niall's face, to his body and he didn't particularly care because Harry was in his arms, unharmed.

"I love you Harry. I love you so much, and I don't know if you have noticed but I really can't live without you. I'm useless on my own. Please don't leave me when I do stupid things. Don't let my foolishness push you away. I'm sorry for what I did. I love you." Niall says. Harry is smiling like a child Christmas morning and wiping Niall's tears with his thumbs.

"You're so silly, Niall." Harry leans in and kisses Niall's rosy nose, giggling just how Niall likes. "I love you, too. I would never leave you." he speaks with his forehead on Niall's slick one. "Don't ever think I'd leave because I won't. I promise." 

Harry's eyes burn green once again and Niall thinks maybe it's because of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading!!!! thank you also for the lovely comments on the previous chapters too. id love to see more comments so please leave one telling me what you think so far!! until next time xxx


	5. Chapter 5

“Hey, babe, I was wondering if you were busy tonight…” Niall says nervously, chewing on his bottom lip.  
Niall had been planning to ask Harry out on a date for a week now, but he never got the chance because the boy was always working or organizing his new flat.  
Harry stayed silent then started giggling.  
“What’s so funny?” Niall asks. His mouth pulls to a wide grin and he presses the phone closer to his ear to hear Harry beautiful laugh for a little longer.  
“Nothing, nothing.” He sighs contently. “I’m free tonight. Why?”  
“I just wanted to take you out to a fancy dinner or something, you know… a date.” He explains and blushes at how shy he sounds. Then, Niall thinks he can hear Harry smiling.  
“I’ll be ready.” Harry says softly. Niall’s cheeks are becoming sore from the smile he wears but he doesn’t want to let up because he’s so damn happy.  
“I’ll be there at 6?” Niall picks at his own nails, waiting for a reply nervously.  
There is a small hesitation before another giggle, and then Harry is saying, “See you then.”    
   
Niall wants the dinner date to be perfect and he dresses in his nicest clothes and makes his hair look its best. He wonders seconds after he’s left his flat if he has overdone himself, but he ignores his paranoia and skips every other stair on his way down through the pub and to his car.  
He’s now knocking on Harry’s door and he feels jittery. He doesn’t understand why because it’s just Harry, but then he thinks again and it’s because it is Harryhe’s feeling this way. The old door is pulled open and Harry is pulling on his converse shoes. Harry looks up and Niall and Niall looks down at Harry, and they both blush because Niall has defiantly overdone it and Harry has defiantly underdone it.  
“You ready?” Niall asks and Harry stands there like a baffled idiot.  
“I look stupidly underdressed compared to you.” Harry cheeks are burning and Niall decides he really like the rosy look on Harry.  
“Here.” Niall shrugs off his blazer and hands it to the younger boy, leaving him only in his button-up and dress pants. Harry puts the black blazer on overtop of his red t-shirt and he likes how well it matches his tight black jeans.  
“That’s better.” Niall smiles and Harry nods in agreement.  
“Are you sure I can wear this though?” Harry flattens the material over his chest and Niall grabs his hand. Their fingers interlockand Harry leans closer to Niall side. The boy locks his door behind the two of them with his free hand and they begin to walk down the hall at a calm pace.  
“I like holding your hand.” Harry blurts out, then throws his palm over his mouth in embarrassment. Niall smiles and kisses Harry’s cheek.  
“Me too.”  
   
The two sit down at a perfectly set table and Niall watches Harry as he observes the room, the paintings and décor, with astonished green eyes. Harry even watches the men and women eating their food, claiming that he feels as though he’s in a movie, which obviously makes Niall laugh.  
They order their food and it comes surprisingly quick, taking into account the amount of people filling each table.  
Harry asks for a simple fish and chips and Niall asks for something he can’t even pronounce. Harry laughs behind his napkin when the waiter comes to serve them their meals. The waiter mocks the way Niall had pronounced the name as he sets it in front of the Irish lad. Niall just laughs and rolls his eyes, thanking the waiter anyways.  
   
“I’m full. I’d like this to-go, please.” Harry says softly to the waiter as he approaches their table.  
“Of course. I will be right back.” Harry nods towards the man and then turns back to Niall to see a worried expression on his face.  
Harry’s food looks barely touched. The cod lying on his plate had only the smallest part missing and Niall thinks maybe Harry ate 7 chips at most.  
“What is it?” Harry questions. Niall shakes his head and smiles at Harry despite his thoughts.  
“You’re not much of an eater, are you?” Niall breathes a short laugh and Harry shrugs plainly with a not-so-cheerful grin.  
“I guess not.” He murmurs. Niall sighs and Harry’s head bolts up, looking into the older lads eyes, guiltily. “b-but don’t get me wrong, I absolutely enjoyed the meal, so thank you.” Harry reaches across the table and intertwines fingers with Niall, like earlier. The two smile in unison and Harry giggles. Harry’s hand tingles with pleasure and he suddenly feels like melting off his chair and pooling on the ground in front of Niall’s feet.  
Loud, high heal shoes are passing their table and a snarl and a gag comes from the male and female couple walking by. Niall knows it’s because Harry is holding his hand so the older pulls away and folds his palm in his lap with his other and he makes sure to gaze anywhere but Harry.  
The younger boy’s chest clenches and he mimics Niall’s hand movements with his own, but letting it tremble weakly in his lap. Their waiter arrives and sets down the check and a to-go containers in the middle of the table. Niall pays for the meal with Harry staying silent, and the whole ride home couldn’t be more unbearable; neither lad saying more then ‘thank you for the food’ and ‘you’re welcome’. Niall offers to walk Harry to his flat and Harry nods without a word, so Niall takes the boy with him up the stairs and down the hall.  
Harry peeks over at Niall a few times before slipping his hand into the blonds’ and bowing his head. Niall mentally thanks the world that Harry isn’t angry with him for earlier, and he squeezes the younger lad’s hand in his. Niall watches as Harry looks up with burning green eyes and he sees the boy’s heated-cheeks dimple inward.  
They reach Harry’s door, and nothing tastes better then Harry’s lips on Niall’s, sealing their sweet goodnights.  
   
The next morning at work Harry comes in with two brown paper bags, and it makes Niall wonder what he had in-store.  
The blond strides over to Harry, who’s settling behind the bar, and he pokes at the bags.  
“What ya got in here?” Niall asks. Harry opens the top of one of the bags and peers inside. He pushes it along the marble counter and smiles brighter then ever.  
“It’s our lunches.” He chants. Niall can hear Dean snort a laugh from across the room. He pulls his attention back to Harry and ruffles his hair, as he would to a child.  
“Thanks, kid.” Niall takes the paper bag into his hand and walks away into the pub’s small kitchen. He’s way too excited to eat the meal prepared for him.   
Later he finds out that it’s only a ham and cheese sandwich, but Niall thinks it’s the best one he’s ever had.  
 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading!!!!sorry for any errors this is not edited. feedback makes me happy please comment :)


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6  
Harry asks Niall one morning of his day off, if the older would like to join him at the shopping centre, and of course, Niall agrees to come along. Harry is hoping to buy a few new outfits and... stuff, for himself. Also, Harry wants to get a present for Niall, so when they get to the centre the boy sends him to a different shop so he doesn't have to worry about the blond seeing his gift. The present he is going to buy isn't for an occasion, just more of a thank you for the fancy date a few days back. Harry wants to keep the it a secret until they got home, so after he purchases it, he hides it in his large almost-leather jacket.

Niall meets up with Harry later and the boy wore a suspicious grin on his face while he shopped for a couple more hours. As they leave the last store, Niall takes half of Harry's clothing-filled bags into his hand and smiles to Harry without a word. Harry doesn't protest against the help as they walk to one of the exits a ways down the mall. The two lad's empty hands brush, and their gazes flick to connect instantly. Harry's face flushes and he slides his cold hand into Niall's perfectly warm one. Niall thinks he hears Harry hum quietly when he squeezes his hand. The blond boy smiles to himself and looks ahead, he notes the large group of reckless, punk, teenage boys approaching but he chooses to ignore them and just stare ahead. 

The first bloke that really catches Niall's eye is a long, blond-haired boy in the front of the hoarded group who wore his snapback crooked on his head. His pants hung low, past his butt, and Niall remembers the days his trousers rested that inappropriately low on his thighs too. Niall is about to laugh to himself but the blond punk leans to his buddy and points at their locked fingers. Niall starts to panic when he realizes he's holding Harry's hand in public and thinks about pulling away but he stops himself and doesn't.

"Faggots!" the blond shouts suddenly, making his crew cackle out disgusting laughs. "Cock suckers." a brunette yells after, gaining a few shoppers attention. Niall shoots the crowd a furious glare and he feels Harry's fingers tremble between his. "Blonde's only in it for the sex, I bet." One boy says to his friend. The group laughs again, and they've finally walked past and now are behind Harry and Niall. The older boy pull his hand out from Harry's and switches the shopping bags over to the other arm, so his free hand was on the side Harry wasn't.

Niall couldn't bare the glance he took at Harry, the boy's lonesome hand is shove deep into his tight denim pocket and his lips are pursed in a thin line, to hold his emotions together. Harry looks betrayed and heart broken and Niall know that it's his entire fault. 

Niall couldn't tell what hurt Harry more; the name calling or Niall letting go. 

 

When Niall walks Harry back to his flat it's quiet and awkward all over again just like the drive home from their date, and he hates every second of it.

Harry shoves his key into his lock and jiggles it lightly and then turns the carved metal roughly. Harry turns around and gives the older lad a watery smile.

"Thanks for today, I had lots of fun." He says sincerely. Niall wants to cry and punch walls because he is stupid and careless, and he should have held Harry's hand tighter- instead of what he did- and he should have stood up for the one he loves because Harry is too nice for his own good and doesn't deserve Niall one little bit.

Harry is about to close the door and Niall rushes to halt Harry while he takes a step forward.

"I love you." Niall blurts out. He panicked on what to say, it was the first thing that came to mind.

The old wood pauses its journey to shut and Harry's hand snakes around the door and offers a small box to Niall. The Irish boy takes it and Harry grips the door handle tighter then proceeds to shut it all the way. 

Niall has to admit, he stood there unmoving in front of Harry's closed door, for a solid 20 minutes before walking back to his car.

 

The small box from Harry sits on Niall's bedside table for hours before he opens it. It's not because he didn't want to open it, it's because he didn't think he deserves whatever was in it for what he did to Harry. 

But eventually curiosity overpowers guilt and Niall peeks inside. Something sparkles, reflecting the light from the ceiling, and his heart clenches painfully because he knew it was something expensive and it made him feel even worse about betraying his love.

Niall opens the small box the rest of the way and pulls out the thin silver chain. A flat green- similar to Harry's eyes, he notes- rock swings back and forth in front of Niall's blue eyes. He scoops the flat, silver rimmed rock into his palm and a tear drips off his face. Guilt is wrenching through his body and he can barely breathe. Niall drops the necklace back into the small delicate box and he runs out the door forgetting his coat, with the gift box clenched tightly in his hand. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you enjoyed!!!! again this is not edited so try to ignore my mistakes :) thank you for reading feedback is greatly appreciated. xxxx


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